Wednesday, March 17, 2010
♥ Relationship Whys?
I was asked a really interesting question the other day here it is. "How do you keep a relationship with Philip, if you guys are so much alike and live so far away?"
Okay I answered briefly to the person who asked me the question then, but then it dawned on me that it's actually an important question. People tell me that when you are in a relationship with someone who is so much like you... you usually come down with these side affects....
-Boredom
-Annoyance
-Fights
-The little things become big things.
-Losing your own identity.
-Losing interest.
-Giving up
-Heart ache
OK I will tackle this small little list in a few points.
1.) Boredom: How in the world do you get bored when you and him share the same interests and views? There should always be something to talk about. Also nobody is COMPLETELY alike, there are differences because no two people can ever be exactly alike. God made every person unique in their own ways. It's always good for people in a Godly relationship to be like minded biblically, thus will avoid conflict in the issue that matters most. That's the only thing I can really thing that any people in a partnership should be paralleled in.
2.) Annoyance/Fights/Little Things Become Big Things: Okay this calls for extreme dumbing down of self. Selfishness is rampant in this world everyone wants what THEY want, it takes real love to sacrifice it. I as a girlfriend and future wife have to realize that God has called me to "submit & honor" my husband. So even though I am not married I still have to learn how to submit. It's hard sometimes since I can be a little dominant at times. But I always have to remember to close my mouth to avoid hurting him. Sure there are times I get annoyed. But why would I make a scene over something that usually is trivial? I am only in relationship mode and the trials I face here will be TRIVIAL to what I will be facing in marriage. It takes work to build a happy home. So why on earth would I wreck what God has already helped me build up by being selfish. In my mind, where Philip goes, I will go, where Philip stays I will stay, his family my family. I will just have to tolerate, love, cherish, every little quirk about him. I KNOW there are huge chips in me and things that he probably gets annoyed with too. But thanks be to God that he has given man kind something called......... PATIENCE. Thus when it is something trivial and small and not jeopardizing our walks with the Lord, I will just have to grit my teeth and smile now won't I? I love him to much to loose him.
3.) Losing your own identity: ..... -.- .... okay this one really got to me..... -.-....... Okay when two people get married.... they become ONE according to the Bible. There is no such thing as ME, ME, ME it's going to be US, US, US. God made the marriage vows to be a COVENANT were TWO become ONE. It's really simple. I really don't have a problem "losing" my identity. I WANT people to look at me and be like.... 'Oh her? That's Philip's girl/wife" I really have 0 problem with it. I Don't mind the thought of 'losing' myself in him. It's called marriage.
4.) Losing Interest/Giving Up/Heart Ache: Long distance relationship generally cause alot of pain. They aren't for everyone. Philip and my relationship hasn't been the easiest one. We've hit many a bump and nearly broken apart. Missing memories, forgetting each other's touch, getting tired of the hurt. Yeah we've been through it. But miraculously GOD has kept bringing us back to his word and making us stronger and stronger after each bump. He picks us up and helps us heal, and strengthens us and as long as we give God the lead ropes he will lead us safely forward. There has been many a time we have almost called it quits, but the second it's uttered out of our lips we start crying because we know that's not how it's supposed to be! So we pray about it and God soothes our troubled souls and lifts us up again. Philip and my relationship is built on the Lord we know he's real in personal life experiences and experiences together.
We'll survive this distance and anything else this world has in store for us. Because God's standing right there. As long as we look to him and treasure each other and give up our selfishness he will lead us safely through thru the storm.
Again as always. Relationships aren't just about gifts, sex, money, feelings, physical beauty, self gratification. It's about building each other up in Christ. Fireproofing each other so that when the fires do come, We'll be able to withstand it. God+Philip+Me ^^
Love you all,
Esa
Okay I answered briefly to the person who asked me the question then, but then it dawned on me that it's actually an important question. People tell me that when you are in a relationship with someone who is so much like you... you usually come down with these side affects....
-Boredom
-Annoyance
-Fights
-The little things become big things.
-Losing your own identity.
-Losing interest.
-Giving up
-Heart ache
OK I will tackle this small little list in a few points.
1.) Boredom: How in the world do you get bored when you and him share the same interests and views? There should always be something to talk about. Also nobody is COMPLETELY alike, there are differences because no two people can ever be exactly alike. God made every person unique in their own ways. It's always good for people in a Godly relationship to be like minded biblically, thus will avoid conflict in the issue that matters most. That's the only thing I can really thing that any people in a partnership should be paralleled in.
2.) Annoyance/Fights/Little Things Become Big Things: Okay this calls for extreme dumbing down of self. Selfishness is rampant in this world everyone wants what THEY want, it takes real love to sacrifice it. I as a girlfriend and future wife have to realize that God has called me to "submit & honor" my husband. So even though I am not married I still have to learn how to submit. It's hard sometimes since I can be a little dominant at times. But I always have to remember to close my mouth to avoid hurting him. Sure there are times I get annoyed. But why would I make a scene over something that usually is trivial? I am only in relationship mode and the trials I face here will be TRIVIAL to what I will be facing in marriage. It takes work to build a happy home. So why on earth would I wreck what God has already helped me build up by being selfish. In my mind, where Philip goes, I will go, where Philip stays I will stay, his family my family. I will just have to tolerate, love, cherish, every little quirk about him. I KNOW there are huge chips in me and things that he probably gets annoyed with too. But thanks be to God that he has given man kind something called......... PATIENCE. Thus when it is something trivial and small and not jeopardizing our walks with the Lord, I will just have to grit my teeth and smile now won't I? I love him to much to loose him.
3.) Losing your own identity: ..... -.- .... okay this one really got to me..... -.-....... Okay when two people get married.... they become ONE according to the Bible. There is no such thing as ME, ME, ME it's going to be US, US, US. God made the marriage vows to be a COVENANT were TWO become ONE. It's really simple. I really don't have a problem "losing" my identity. I WANT people to look at me and be like.... 'Oh her? That's Philip's girl/wife" I really have 0 problem with it. I Don't mind the thought of 'losing' myself in him. It's called marriage.
4.) Losing Interest/Giving Up/Heart Ache: Long distance relationship generally cause alot of pain. They aren't for everyone. Philip and my relationship hasn't been the easiest one. We've hit many a bump and nearly broken apart. Missing memories, forgetting each other's touch, getting tired of the hurt. Yeah we've been through it. But miraculously GOD has kept bringing us back to his word and making us stronger and stronger after each bump. He picks us up and helps us heal, and strengthens us and as long as we give God the lead ropes he will lead us safely forward. There has been many a time we have almost called it quits, but the second it's uttered out of our lips we start crying because we know that's not how it's supposed to be! So we pray about it and God soothes our troubled souls and lifts us up again. Philip and my relationship is built on the Lord we know he's real in personal life experiences and experiences together.
We'll survive this distance and anything else this world has in store for us. Because God's standing right there. As long as we look to him and treasure each other and give up our selfishness he will lead us safely through thru the storm.
Again as always. Relationships aren't just about gifts, sex, money, feelings, physical beauty, self gratification. It's about building each other up in Christ. Fireproofing each other so that when the fires do come, We'll be able to withstand it. God+Philip+Me ^^
Love you all,
Esa
Daughter of the King
3:15 PM
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3:15 PM
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